First of all, what’s going on in New York – or wherever this guy is – with the attack on UnitedHealthcare is disgusting.

A man was murdered in the street as if we were a third world country. I don’t care how much you hate the healthcare system, this is unacceptable on almost every level.

Brian Thompson is dead and his killer is somehow still…roaming the streets. Wild. It’s disgusting.

With that all out of the way, let’s take a moment to poke fun at CNN. That could be true, right? What else do you do on a Saturday morning?

I’ve heard a lot of conspiracy theories this week about what exactly happened in Manahatten. Everyone from Nancy Pelosi to Hillary Clinton to Aaron Judge is a suspect on the internet. Honestly, social media was built over weeks like this. And buddy, the tinfoil hats are thriving right now.

Anyway, I have a new craziest theory leader in the clubhouse, and he arrived last night courtesy of the folks at CNN.

Roll the tape!

I think it’s possible…

Whoaaaaaaaaaaa, Nellie! What a plot twist that would be. Brian Thompson, who had a net worth of more than $10 million, paid someone to murder him on the streets of New York City so that his family could be left A) in a “good light” or B) that Got money from life insurance.

Again, he was worth $10 million. I’m just repeating it here.

That would certainly be… something. Thanks for sharing, CNN! We’ll take a look at that.

Look, I guess it can’t be dismissed entirely. The year is 2024. This has been by far the craziest calendar year in the history of time. We had a former president who was almost assassinated, a sitting president who was overthrown by his own party. Bill Belichick is dating a 23-year-old former cheerleader while applying for the job at UNC.

Clearly anything is possible in 2024.

I guess we’ll go with this theory from former Maryland State Police Commander Neill Franklin. He has more street credibility than me, so who am I to judge?

Is it crazy now? Secure. Does it sound like an episode of Grey’s Anatomy? Absolutely. Honestly, it’s a little lame for Grey’s Anatomy. Can it do that? so much better that this happened on CNN? Secure. What a run for them!

But that doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. Seems unlikely, but I expect we’ll find out soon enough.

Or not, because no one can find this guy.

Stay tuned.