For vulgar-minded Brits, a Hollywood film title sometimes carries its own unintended associations and unfortunate resonances. Many were pained by the strong reaction of some here in 2017 to the title of Robert Redford’s serious film Our Souls at Night. Here’s a moderate new piece of Netflix property, a thriller about a bomb smuggled onto a plane in carry-on luggage, starring Taron Egerton as Ethan, the airport security guard in a tense situation, and Jason Bateman as a sinister explosives mastermind . It’s called… Carry On.

This title is self-explanatory to anyone in the United States. But it’s sure to get British Netflix subscribers very excited, assuming they will, that the biggest film series in the history of cinema will soon be rebooted with a sexy new cast. Egerton is British. Couldn’t he have warned Netflix that the film might have been retitled for the UK?

And it must be said that Egerton, with his hangdog looks and expression of pained misery, has essentially taken on the role of Kenneth Connor. His girlfriend, who incidentally has the same name Nora, is played by Sofia Carson; She is pregnant and nags Ethan to pursue his dreams and reapply to the police academy. I spent the entire movie thinking about how Joan Sims would have handled the role, probably by giving Ethan a few slaps. Dean Norris plays the tough, wizened head of airport security; If his character’s wrinkled face just occasionally broke into a grin while he let out a whistling haah-haah-haah laugh, then that would be a Sidney James looker. As for Jason Bateman’s ghoulish terrorist, his face full of haughty disapproval and contempt… he can only imitate Kenneth Williams.

This carry-on could really have been more oriented towards the classic features. While he was fighting the villains, Egerton could have denounced the disgrace, the disgrace, they’re all in control… Well, it wasn’t to be.