Clay Aiken protects his peace.

The American Idol alum – who recently marked his return to music with the new album Christmas bells are ringing — told PEOPLE about his dating life and explained why he refuses to change his behavior around a potential partner.

“I just turned 46 and realized I’m too old to change my behavior for anyone. Unless I find someone who is happy to sit on the other end of the couch and not talk for hours, then I will” “I’m perfectly fine not having to deal with this,” Aiken tells PEOPLE exclusively.

He continues: “You shouldn’t have to change, but we do. When we’re younger, we end up thinking we should do it… and as we get older, we realize, ‘I just didn’t do that.’ the energy for it.’”

However, if love does find him, Aiken is open to it – and he knows exactly what an ideal partner for him would look like.

“If there is a perfect soulmate out there for me, then he would be perfectly happy to spend a full 24 hours in the same house without having to speak. That’s the dream,” says Aiken, adding that he hopes to be happy “to go live in a small town,” away from “clubs.”

“I just don’t have the energy to do any of it,” he continues.

Aiken came out as gay in a 2008 cover story for PEOPLE. At the time, he said the birth of his son inspired him to take this step.

“It was the first decision I made as a father,” Aiken, then 29, said at the time. “I cannot raise a child to lie or hide things. I wasn’t raised like that and I won’t raise a child like that.”

Reflecting on the moment with PEOPLE, Aiken — who starred on Broadway Spamalot When he came out, he said he was glad he was able to get the information out to the public, even if it was met with backlash.

“For the first four months I was there, the show was sold out, standing room only. You can actually look at ticket sales the week after the cover came out,” he says. “It sold very well until ticket sales dropped a week after the cover came out. Spamalot was finally closed a few months later.

“We live in a completely different time,” he continues. “I lost maybe 50 percent of the fan base.”

Now, Aiken is focusing on his 16-year-old son Parker and diving back into the music industry, starting with his Christmas album: “I wanted to do something that would just make people happy – and Christmas makes everyone happy.”